The Hot Mess to Awesomeness Podcast has ALWAYS been about amplifying women’s voices. And about highlighting the tenacity, capacity and resilience of women. In the early days of the pandemic I felt compelled to speak with and support women, who like myself, were struggling to find their way through so much uncertainty. 


Over the past 2 years my mission, and reason for showing up every week, has deepened to include my need to shine a light into the dark places where so many women feel alone.

The women I get to speak have, or are, facing uncertainties and unknowns involving

  1. Trauma
  2. Sovereignty
  3. Race
  4. Autonomy
  5. Anatomy
  6. Motherhood
  7. Mothering
  8. Flourishing
  9. Authentic living

And how they learned to thrive through the hot mess oppressive conditioning that for generations has normalized the debasement of women.  


Right now, I’m shocked by whats happening in the US (re: Roe v Wade) I’m overwhelmed with emotion and reminded that in these moments when rage wants to take over, if I want to make a difference I must focus on what I can do then go and do it. 


I’m not famous my words won’t ring out in political arenas (anytime soon) but I have a voice and today I offer it here for anyone who feels powerless against the patriarchy. 


My story is unique and I know shared by many. 


I played the role of the "good girl" for a long time. And the constant negating of ME for the good of everyone else, led to years of feeling like I wasn't …

1- Good enough 

2- Worthy without giving part of myself away 

3- And Powerless in almost every area of my life. 


I spent decades focusing on  how I was failing at doing enough, pleasing enough, being worthy enough and sadly I missed out on celebrating all the ways that I am in fact fucking AWESOME! 


Have you felt the depths of this failure? Endured constant bad mouthing from inside your own head and are exhausted by always trying to do more? 


You are not alone contrary to how they want you to feel!

Saying that reminds me of the scene in Harry Potter when Harry comes back from the tri-wizard tournament, Cedric is dead and no one believes him that Voldemort is back! And Luna tells Harry that she doesn’t think he’s crazy, and that if she was Voldemort she would want him to feel alone because...

Then it would be easier to destroy him! 


That’s what this reminds me. The socialized belief that each of us is alone, crazy! 


Today, aside of sharing one of the many life lessons from Harry Potter, in this episode I want to share with you the TOP 10 made up, bullshit, unrealistic “good girl” expectations I was conditioned to believe, and failed to "live up to" in hopes that it helps you to define and highlight where some of the bullshit your inner critic stays comes from! 


For the full transcript including the 10 Bullshit Good Girl rules, along with my strong and warranted opinion of them, check out the Hot Mess to Awesomeness blog.


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